well well well then my little chickadees (i do apologize if you are not related to chickens in any way,shape or form but anyway; I am going to do something quite alarming and unprecedented (big word) i'm going to review a game i actually like! I know! scary prospect but anyway as you smart-arses may have guessed Infamous 2 is the game i'm reviewing today.
So i got Infamous 1 as a present from Sony when the PSN went down and quite frankly i loved it and thought that the only way to improve it was to get a better fucking ending! *ahem* but that was a niche Infamous 2 filled quite nicely and i very nearly felt more than a bit sad and that was only a good ending!
But while Infamous has a really good story the gameplay is nicely varied as well with a good movement system a nice wide sandbox and a, um, sexy combat mechanic and it all fits beautifully together like a jigsaw puzzle of a swimsuit model... without the swimsuit but Infamous' main feature is the fact that it has a moral choice system.
Now while many reviewers feel that moral choice systems are complete poop i feel that there is nothing wrong with them and that it just goes to show that the developers love their game all the more when they'll put that much work into it! of course if they didn't put enough work into it and had merely used it as a way of saying 'look we have lots of content we're not lazy' then i may have to kill. MUST KILL!
*sigh* well i'm glad we live in a world where such things will never happen
Its still a really good game alright?!
-100% Cynicality
Monday, 6 February 2012
Sunday, 15 January 2012
Update
Alrighty then, I've had so much indecision about what to write in this thing that I've driven myself to death, I am a busy guy! I've got to do the follow spot in a pantomime and be a panto-dame in another so all my time is spent worrying about these things is time wasted on my Blog.(I've probably now lost all my viewers but) I need a bit o' help guy's, I need comments! Maybe just for a couple of weeks or so but after that I'll go back to being my selfcentered self so come on people!
Typing this on iPod after wanking myself to death
-100% Cynicality
Typing this on iPod after wanking myself to death
-100% Cynicality
Saturday, 7 January 2012
YoGscast
Okay I've discovered a scary thing about myself: I can't feel revved up to write a review unless it's got at least one thing that's got me all riled up so, with that in mind, The Yogscast.
Now the Yogscast have been parading around the streets of YouTube for a while now and I think it's time someone challenged their status now even if it's just some twat with a keyboard on Blogger. Regardless I used to be quite into Yogscast, I mean, until they started bullshitting me. I presume my experience with the Yogscast was similar to everyone else's: "um why are they so popular for animating with an etch-a-sketch? Oh, it's Minecraft? Oh these guys are incandescently fucking whore-some! "But" the people cry "You said you couldn't write unless there was a stream of piss emanating from your mouth at all times" and to that I reply 'only use fucking quote marks unless it's a FUCKING QUOTE! and wait, 'cause here's the malevolence.
So after they fronted a stream of successful Minecraft videos they built a large fanbase who wouldn't move even if there was a fucking nuke under their seats and recruited a slew of interesting and ne-ahahaha I'm only kidding. My first warning blazer went off when after the survival island series they introduced two new characters who were here to stay, okay thinks I it can't be too bad. Flash forward to now and we've been dropped into the sink of shit and are circling the drainpipe. see what worked well with the Yogscast was that it was very tight and Simon and Lewis (the two main founders of the Yogscast) did compliment each other so the video's worked well. but now they've got too many people to know what to do with and seem to have cut the whole Minecraft show! not the shadow of Israphel, god no, but everything else and the most interesting prospect on the Minecraft front is to watch all the NEEDLESS support characters swagger about while Simon and Lewis go along with it! but what annoys me most is that now they've finished with minecraft they're going on to first person shooters and new releases on steam which would work fine in a jack-of-all-trades channel like say, SSoHPKC or something but not with the Yogscast, since what made them good was Minecraft but they've forgotten it.
Congrats guys you're almost real celebrities, becoming famous on X Factor then claiming it was you're own talents which sailed you to the top.
I am randomly replacing Alex's Signoff -Tom
Hey, fuck off my signature - Alex
Now the Yogscast have been parading around the streets of YouTube for a while now and I think it's time someone challenged their status now even if it's just some twat with a keyboard on Blogger. Regardless I used to be quite into Yogscast, I mean, until they started bullshitting me. I presume my experience with the Yogscast was similar to everyone else's: "um why are they so popular for animating with an etch-a-sketch? Oh, it's Minecraft? Oh these guys are incandescently fucking whore-some! "But" the people cry "You said you couldn't write unless there was a stream of piss emanating from your mouth at all times" and to that I reply 'only use fucking quote marks unless it's a FUCKING QUOTE! and wait, 'cause here's the malevolence.
So after they fronted a stream of successful Minecraft videos they built a large fanbase who wouldn't move even if there was a fucking nuke under their seats and recruited a slew of interesting and ne-ahahaha I'm only kidding. My first warning blazer went off when after the survival island series they introduced two new characters who were here to stay, okay thinks I it can't be too bad. Flash forward to now and we've been dropped into the sink of shit and are circling the drainpipe. see what worked well with the Yogscast was that it was very tight and Simon and Lewis (the two main founders of the Yogscast) did compliment each other so the video's worked well. but now they've got too many people to know what to do with and seem to have cut the whole Minecraft show! not the shadow of Israphel, god no, but everything else and the most interesting prospect on the Minecraft front is to watch all the NEEDLESS support characters swagger about while Simon and Lewis go along with it! but what annoys me most is that now they've finished with minecraft they're going on to first person shooters and new releases on steam which would work fine in a jack-of-all-trades channel like say, SSoHPKC or something but not with the Yogscast, since what made them good was Minecraft but they've forgotten it.
Congrats guys you're almost real celebrities, becoming famous on X Factor then claiming it was you're own talents which sailed you to the top.
I am randomly replacing Alex's Signoff -Tom
Hey, fuck off my signature - Alex
Tuesday, 3 January 2012
Modern Warfare/Call of Duty
Okay, okay, I lied about the time gap but what do you want it's only blogger after all. but back to that reviewing thing I said I'd do.
The Call of Duty series has been a pincushion in my penis for a while now but of the most obnoxious of all of those I found to be the Modern Warfare series. Now while I never played C.O.D 4 (yes, see the dots, it should be pronounced 'See Oh Dee') I have heard from several RELIABLE sources (reliable in all emphasis) that it was pretty good, the single player anyway, since a competitive multiplayer in these kind of FPS will always be boring, repetitive, frustrating, unbalanced, samey grind-boxes and uttering that sentence doesn't sound enjoyable does it?
But back when M.W.2 (yes, Emm Double-you Too) was fresh from the market and people were raving about it, it piqued my curiosity enough to pick up the buggering thing to play it. Now I first went into it in the mindset of "surely this has to have a really good single player right?" and two hours later I stood up again and said "what a fucking waste of time". Yes this was shit, the single player was a very short, very samey , very boring time sink where I hid behind pillars popping out and shooting Russians and police officers. that was the extent of the enemies in the game! So after some nagging and a broken controller me and my 'friend' played a match together and this was where I learned that the community were complete and total toss-pots only content to 'quick-scope' and 'trick-shot' and would rag on for hours about how I didn't manage to exceed their excellence when jumping off a ten story building spinning around and blindly firing my bloody sniper rifle of all things at their heads and their total mind numbing powers of ignorance when they told me they not only got that right but that they get it right every single fucking time (I don't even know how to grammar check that sentence! - Tom).
As the obvious man said to the manager of the manure facility: 'This is bullshit!' how is anyone supposed to stay entertained throughout all of this? I've heard M.W.3 is the same but better and if that's so then I refuse to put up with it any longer! I will allow one more game to sum up the plot but that's it! we cannot allow this crap to continue any longer. Why? Because it's boring! If all we're going to do is release update packs with no bloody innovation for years on end then what's the fucking point? The community of the Modern warfare are total dipshits. tell you what infinity ward, we'll put you in a game with the world's 'best' trick-shotters and see how long you last out. then they might finally realize the fucking monstrosity that this game is!
Please can people with brains reply to the halfwits that argue with this review with: "No it isn't blah you suck blah i am amazing at the game blah it's just cause you suck..."
Incredibly Bloody Annoyed- 100% Cynicality
The Call of Duty series has been a pincushion in my penis for a while now but of the most obnoxious of all of those I found to be the Modern Warfare series. Now while I never played C.O.D 4 (yes, see the dots, it should be pronounced 'See Oh Dee') I have heard from several RELIABLE sources (reliable in all emphasis) that it was pretty good, the single player anyway, since a competitive multiplayer in these kind of FPS will always be boring, repetitive, frustrating, unbalanced, samey grind-boxes and uttering that sentence doesn't sound enjoyable does it?
But back when M.W.2 (yes, Emm Double-you Too) was fresh from the market and people were raving about it, it piqued my curiosity enough to pick up the buggering thing to play it. Now I first went into it in the mindset of "surely this has to have a really good single player right?" and two hours later I stood up again and said "what a fucking waste of time". Yes this was shit, the single player was a very short, very samey , very boring time sink where I hid behind pillars popping out and shooting Russians and police officers. that was the extent of the enemies in the game! So after some nagging and a broken controller me and my 'friend' played a match together and this was where I learned that the community were complete and total toss-pots only content to 'quick-scope' and 'trick-shot' and would rag on for hours about how I didn't manage to exceed their excellence when jumping off a ten story building spinning around and blindly firing my bloody sniper rifle of all things at their heads and their total mind numbing powers of ignorance when they told me they not only got that right but that they get it right every single fucking time (I don't even know how to grammar check that sentence! - Tom).
As the obvious man said to the manager of the manure facility: 'This is bullshit!' how is anyone supposed to stay entertained throughout all of this? I've heard M.W.3 is the same but better and if that's so then I refuse to put up with it any longer! I will allow one more game to sum up the plot but that's it! we cannot allow this crap to continue any longer. Why? Because it's boring! If all we're going to do is release update packs with no bloody innovation for years on end then what's the fucking point? The community of the Modern warfare are total dipshits. tell you what infinity ward, we'll put you in a game with the world's 'best' trick-shotters and see how long you last out. then they might finally realize the fucking monstrosity that this game is!
Please can people with brains reply to the halfwits that argue with this review with: "No it isn't blah you suck blah i am amazing at the game blah it's just cause you suck..."
Incredibly Bloody Annoyed- 100% Cynicality
Tuesday, 20 December 2011
Reviews Overview
So then internet. I've decided to make an online journal, since blog sounds like a repugnant fart in the middle of raspberry jelly but anyway, this "blog" is going to be my little haven to rant on about some things I particularly like or dislike. Including books, films, music and my particular favorite video games.
I will take suggestions but please remember: while I have quite a few games for PC and PS3 (but don't dismay Xbox fans I can, have and will play the Xbox) I am not Bill Gates so don't be offended if I don't review "Deus Ex: The 24 carat gold edition".
I think that does it for that session and I will try to bring SOMETHING out at least once a day but if I forget/can't be arsed/am busy then don't immediately assume I've cancelled it. the longest i can imagine one not being posted is a fortnight but nevertheless i will be around for quite some time not being 80 years old.
That about does it for now as i'm getting a pain in my right arm of which I should be saving for my evening wank.
-100% Cynicallity
PS. Help, Alex has put me in a box and wont let me out until I grammar check his posts :(
I wonder if he will actually read this, lol.
I will take suggestions but please remember: while I have quite a few games for PC and PS3 (but don't dismay Xbox fans I can, have and will play the Xbox) I am not Bill Gates so don't be offended if I don't review "Deus Ex: The 24 carat gold edition".
I think that does it for that session and I will try to bring SOMETHING out at least once a day but if I forget/can't be arsed/am busy then don't immediately assume I've cancelled it. the longest i can imagine one not being posted is a fortnight but nevertheless i will be around for quite some time not being 80 years old.
That about does it for now as i'm getting a pain in my right arm of which I should be saving for my evening wank.
-100% Cynicallity
PS. Help, Alex has put me in a box and wont let me out until I grammar check his posts :(
I wonder if he will actually read this, lol.
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